Tuesday 24 December 2013

December Newsletter 2013
Change  - PART 2
What does change look like? 

It is Christmas Eve.  For many of us it is a night laden with expectations, pressure and busy-ness as we put the finishing touches to wrapping or dash out for something we forgot.  For the lucky ones it means fun, family and laughter.  For most of us who celebrate Christmas, it is a stressful combination of all of these.

Putting the pieces together.


The Meditation Society of Australia ( meditation.org.au )suggest these tips for making the most of Christmas:
1. Stop and listen and really engage with the elderly and play with the children. The best gift you can give is always love, followed closely by time.
2. Walk somewhere quiet and love yourself. Find 10 minutes even amongst the hustle and bustle of everything to walk alone, listen to music, repeat an affirmation - be in silent love with yourself. Be the example of the way you want others to love you by loving yourself that way.
3. Laugh. Let yourself enjoy the moment. Try for one day to leave all the things you have to do or are waiting to do and just be there in the moment, in the present moment and fill it with your engaged heart.

Whilst they seem like lovely ideas, they may be easier said than done, especially if it is our habit to worry about special occasions.  If you are not familiar with meditation practice some of this might be a tricky - how do you leave all the things you have to do behind you for a day when they are uppermost in your mind?

In some ways this conundrum illustrates my main point today, if we are not enjoying some aspects of the way we currently live but don’t know what else to do, where do we start with making a change? The answer lies within the three tips above, each of them includes a moment of “stopping”.  Time to step away from the chatter in our minds about our difficulties, an interval in the ongoing movie of our lives to look around and connect with who is here right now, a deliberate gap in activities to just be alone and check in with “now”.

This is the essence of mindfulness, it is no complicated process, but simply described as deliberately paying attention to the present moment without judgment.  But its challenge lies in being persistent about practice.  The benefits are that we can step off the merry-go-round of our worries, relax a little, become resilient to difficulties and so much more.
Taking a moment to appreciate the mint in the garden.


If things are not working for you right now, be it the Christmas rush or that you feel you have had enough of the status quo - your first step might be just to stop.  Perhaps for 1 minute only at first, try this:

  • Find a comfortable spot.
  • Stop and breath. 
  • Stop and listen.  
  • Stop and just look at what is front of you.  
  • Let thoughts come and go as you focus on your breath and other senses.
  • Notice what is here right now, good or bad, as it is, use curiosity to guide you rather than judgement.

There is nothing else to do in this moment, no goal to set, no standard to reach, no right or wrong, this is just a moment to be.  This moment can be the first thing you do as you begin to change things you would like to be different.

The gift of clarity that comes when we take time to stop and be, can allow us to connect with what we really desire.  After we have become used to being mindful and being in touch with our selves, we can use our creativity to build up a picture or vision of how change looks for us.  Perhaps it is simpler than we think - a  space to sit quietly each day, a small garden, a new friend. Or perhaps it is huge - a new job, a different home, a new outlook on everything.  What ever it is that your heart really desires, no matter how big or small, it will have a feeling, a set of senses, a look, an essence and a vision.  Creativity comes to the fore as you develop a full sense of what this change will be like.  Sometimes pictures, words, symbols, sculptures or songs can help to flesh out this picture.  Being in touch with this vision is a powerful tool as you build up the meaning and purpose that gives you the fuel to be an agent of change in your life.

In the last newsletter I gave you a Micheal Rennie inspired activity to ask yourself if you really want to change and what it might mean to meddle with the status quo.  If you are ready to take the plunge but need some help with the details, mindfulness and it’s gift of clarity and de-stressing can enable us to connect with what we really want.  In feeling and envisioning the elements of the change we wish you to live, we gather the strength and the direction that is so important as take steps forward.

So if you are ready, ask yourself, what does change look like for you?  Take some time to foster clarity and mindfulness and use this to get in touch with what you really want.  Fill out your vision with the creative modes that work for you.

I changed my front door this year, after a 7 year wait.  Here it is, dressed for Christmas and framing the silhouettes of gum trees.












Wishing you a peaceful holiday season, 

Kind regards, 

Fiona Claire.

Work with me: Individual Counselling, Creativity and Therapeutic Singing and Songwriting Sessions by appointment. Email: fionaclaire@optusnet.com.au or call 0437 985 132